Knockoffs Welcome

For our sixth anniversary last October, I received a wonderful surprise. That trademark blue box with a white satin ribbon. Ahhhh, my husband has figured out a secret that many men have yet to discover: The key to a girl’s heart is in a Tiffany’s box.

Literally.

Inside the box was a silver key with a heart at the top, the same one that had been featured on dog-eared page of a Tiffany’s catalog in which I’d playfully marked all the items I wanted (um, everything!). Cody had stashed it away as his secret weapon, his break-glass-in-case-of-emergency of sorts for gift-giving occasions. He’d strategically had the box shipped to a friend’s home so I wouldn’t find it before he did. (P.S. These newlywed friends will now start receiving the Tiffany blue catalog in a Tiffany blue envelope full of Tiffany wonderfulness. Dani, you can thank me later.)

That necklace has become a staple in my jewelry collection. I wear it almost every day, including while I was traveling last week in New Orleans. And that’s where it happened. A woman who’d been onboard the elevator with us remarked, “Oh look, you’ve got the same necklace!”

Dear Lord, no.



It was – gasp! – the dreaded Jane Seymour Open Hearts key necklace, just $54.99 at your local Kay Jewelers. (My apologies to those of you who will receive this monstrosity for Valentine’s Day.) There it was. In the flesh. Or metal, I guess. Someone actually bought it, was wearing it and standing right in front of me. Worse yet, they thought mine came from the same store. My head started spinning, “I wonder if Tiffany’s will let me exchange this one for a different design? It’s only been four months, right?”

Oh, silly, silly girl. But before I come off sounding like a pompous ass, let me explain.

Not only do I resent the blatant knockoff of my lovely Tiffany’s necklace, but I’ve despised that twisted hearts design since Dr. Quinn: Medicine Woman debuted her “collection” on TV. To me, it looks like a curvaceous woman’s anatomy – think bust and rear. Or, more nicely put, a deranged snake. Take your pick.

Now, this hideous boobs/butt design appears inside the space of a heart-shaped key. And at a fraction of the price my thoughtful husband paid for my designer version. Ugh. Isn’t that how it always works?

Every time I see that commercial on television – and let me tell you, it’s on nonstop this time of year – I feel a little bit guilty. OK, a lot guilty. Is this what I have become? Some snobby fashionista who looks down her nose at the unfortunate mall jewelry wearers?

Well, folks: I’m about as far from a fashionista as you can get. After all, fashionistas don’t own cowboy boots, and if they do, they’re for fashion (though I do consider mine quite stylish, it’s all relative I suppose). And honestly, any item in my closet that didn’t come from Target or Forever 21 has a 99.5% chance of having been scavenged from mall clearance racks. Seriously, people, I rarely buy things at full price, and I do mean RARELY. And anything that might be considered “designer” was most likely a gift.   

So, I got to thinking: Does brand matter? When it comes to clothing, jewelry, etc., I would argue no, brand doesn’t matter, though I will admit that I can’t hold back my glee when getting something “designer,” mostly because I own so few things that fit into that category. How about cars? Nope, my plain old Nissan is perfectly fine. I don’t need to upgrade to Infiniti (Nissan’s luxury brand) or something fancier. And groceries? I am the queen of buying store brand. Except ketchup. I’ve been informed it’s not the same, and I might actually agree on this one.

The list could go on, but overall, brand doesn’t matter. The reason Kay Jewelers and Dr. Quinn have copied my beloved Tiffany’s necklace is because it’s nice. People like it. Therefore, it will sell. And we’ve all heard copying is a form of flattery, right? (What teenage girl has counted that as an acceptable reason why their arch frenemy showed up in the same prom dress?)

Being copied is usually quite annoying, sometimes downright infuriating. It feels like someone is taking something away from your individuality, and instead of being unique and original, you’ve become part of a sea of sameness. Teenage girls may all pine for the same brand of jeans, attempting to (unsuccessfully) persuade their parents that brand matters. Funny how this be-like-everyone-else attitude shifts significantly when it comes to something more personal – like a prom dress.

But there is one instance where copycats are actually quite welcome and where brand DOES matter. Your own personal brand. Your beliefs and values, those are what matter. Believe it or not, when you’re a good person, it spreads. If you’re lucky, it spreads like the flu in a daycare toy box.

Have you ever been around someone like that? Who just gives off that good person vibe? You want to be like them, not for the way they dress, the car they drive or how cool they seem. But because they have a strong personal brand, and they live it every day. That's quite admirable, and definitely worth copying.

Who knew? Sometimes knockoffs are actually welcome.

Lessons From the Clover

All you former 4-Hers out there ought to remember a little something we call the 4-H pledge:

I pledge my Head to clearer thinking,
my Heart to greater loyalty,
my Hands to larger service and
my Health to better living,
for my club, my community,
my country, and my world.

I remember reciting this pledge, complete with hand motions, at the beginning of every meeting back in the sickly green lighting of the Blue Ridge Elementary gymnasium. It didn’t mean much to me as a kid, but looking back as an adult I can see the need to start focusing on the four H’s.

My head’s not always in the right spot. Often I let myself get overwhelmed, distracted, disenchanted, you name it. When my head reels with thoughts, clearer thinking would be a welcome change.

My heart sometimes gets ignored by my over-thinking head. I cannot think of a time where following my heart has led me astray, yet I can think of many where my head took me on a rollercoaster of a ride. I need to be more loyal to myself, which will allow me to be more loyal to the ones I love.

My hands could be doing more for others, not just myself. My head and my heart tend to focus on just me and my own well being, but get so preoccupied with selfishness that my hands are pretty much rendered incapable of doing any good elsewhere. It’s about time I spend more effort focusing on how I can help others.

My health has always been something I’m mindful of, but not always actively doing something about. From eating healthier to working out more regularly, there are so many simple things I can do, and need to do, to improve my wellness. This must become a bigger priority in my life.

So, there you have it: the four H’s behind 4-H, and darn good principles to implement in our adult lives.

Oh, How I Love My Car



My car is totally awesome. More awesome than
this picture because mine has an
Eat Beef license plate.



Often, while driving to work I catch myself thinking how awesome my car is. Why? Because it’s paid for. It makes me want to shout it to the world with a giant bumper sticker or personalized license plate that reads something like PAIDFOR or DEBTFRE. Dave Ramsey would be proud. I don’t care that my 2001 Nissan Xterra has 109,000 miles on it or that it was manufactured when I was a sophomore in college. It’s 100% paid for. Hallelujah!

Not only is it paid for, but we finally got over ourselves and chose to make some significant and difficult lifestyle changes in the last year to make this happen. So, it is really a personal victory, not just a financial one. We sold our 2008 Jeep Wrangler and our 2008 GMC Sierra, both of which we absolutely adored and had a hard time parting with.

We went from having two vehicles purchased brand new (giant mistakes #1 and #2) to having two used vehicles (best decision ever). I drive my Xterra and for Cody, we bought my dad’s 1996 Chevy Silverado, which I drove to Minnesota in 2003 for one of my internships. I can still remember jamming out somewhere on I-35 in rural Iowa to a then-new Pat Green CD as I passed mile after mile of corn fields and swine operations.

Making the difficult but smart decision to downgrade vehicles (and downgrade significantly) with the intention of eliminating car payments completely has been totally worth it. We now have two payments left on the truck and after March 15, we are debt-free as far as cars go. How amazing is that?

Like many Americans, we had bought into the idea that we would always have a car payment, that it was just a fact of life. It doesn’t have to be that way. I find that I enjoy my 10-year-old SUV far more than I ever enjoyed our brand new vehicles, even with the new car smell, cool gadgets, shiny new paint, soft leather, etc. Funny how not having a car payment can make you love your car more than you could possibly imagine. Yep, being completely car-payment-free is going to be pretty awesome. Now, on to eliminating that house payment.